What comes next?

It has been 6 months since my ankle surgery and all is well, for the most part. I can walk and even jog a bit without noticing any pain or stiffness in the ankle. I don't think it will ever be completely normal again, but I am basically pain free. The only thing I still can't do is stand on my tip toes to the same height as my other foot--and that's not exactly a huge concern since I'm not a ballerina!

The scar is fading and is not nearly as tender as it had been. I'm thinking about using Mederma to help fade it even more as I am in a wedding in 6 weeks and will not be wearing hose. So, I'll either have to be photographed from the other sides or the bride might just have to deal with the scar. Luckily. the bride is my sister and I know she doesn't care much :)

The latest medical drama in my life--my shoulder now requires "rotator cuff decompression" surgery. I had another MRI at the beginning of June and found out that I have an impingement in my right shoulder. Basically, there is a piece of bone that rubs and rips my rotator cuff every time I move my arm. Nothing will fix it other than surgery. I had a cortisone shot (helped) and am getting ready to go back to PT to work on strengthening the muscles. My doc wants me in PT 4-5x/wk...this makes me laugh. There just aren't enough hours in the day.

I'm nervous about this surgery because I have heard some horror stories about the recovery. My doc says the whole thing can be done with the scope and that I should be back to work before my disability kicks in (2 weeks) but I know my body and that nothing is ever as simple as it seems. For the first week I will be in a sling and only allowed out when using the machine that will help raise and lower the arm on a schedule. After that week I'll be allowed out of the sling and into PT...from there, who knows? I'm scared that once they get the scope in the joint they will find more damage, just like what happened with my peroneus brevis. But, it has to be fixed so I just have to suck it up and deal. Can't wait to tell my boss that I'll be out AGAIN...she's going to hate me.

No More CAM Walker!

I'm now about 10-11 weeks post-op and finally out of the CAM walker, aka Moon Boot. My physical therapist thought that the CAM was "holding me back" and recommended that my doc put me in a new Donjoy brace to give me more mobility.

There are a few pros and cons.

Pros
--the Donjoy is much smaller and only encompasses my ankle, not half of my leg
--I have more of a real walking motion (heel roll to toe) and not a clomping/clunking anymore

Cons
--Though it's smaller than the CAM, it's extremely difficult to fit into a shoe. I can only get it into my New Balance sneaker right now, and that's w/o lacing the shoe up completely. I might have to go shoe shopping, my least favorite activity.
--It's $120 and my insurance might not cover it. Bummer.
--It rubs right against where I had the bone chip removed and has a tendency to hurt.
--Because it allows more range of motion I will probably have an increase in swelling for a while as my ankle gets used to doing more work.

Overall, the Cons are greater but the fact that it's just NOT THE MOON BOOT trumps everything else. Wearing dress shoes is probably not going to happen for a while, but as long as I make progress I hope that I'll get to a point that I can go brace free soon.

I get to increase my work hours next week. Instead of only working 5 hour days I'll be going to 5 hour days 3x/wk and normal 8 hr shifts the other two days. It's a small increase, but any progress is good at this point.

The first day back...

I survived my first "day" back at work. I'm only working from 9am-2pm this week, simply because I have to keep the swelling down and have two hours of PT to do after work. So, 5 hours has the potential to go by pretty fast and is very manageable.

That said, I'm exhausted already. I had insomnia last night, worrying about going back to work of all things. I don't like being out of the loop and felt so lost when I walked into the office today. The whole office was rearranged while I was out, and even my desk was moved and on the other side. I wandered the cube maze until I found my name plate.

Once I managed to get into my computer, I had over 6000 e-mails to wade through. I spent two hours straight on this task and still have about 1000 left to go through. I had to stop reading them and just start dumping some and keeping the ones to be read at a later time. It was astounding. Then I found out that there were some IT changes and all of the documents/files I had stored on my desktop are now gone...permanently. There is no way to get them back. Lovely. Could they have told me about this BEFORE I left so I could save stuff? HA.

There is a saying that the more things change the more they stay the same...this is how work is for me. Overall, the basic concepts are still there as the federal government still isn't forcing lenders to work with their customers, no matter how much they like to tout how much this stimulus will help homeowners. Hogwash. Things will not change until they are forced to change.

There are just little procedural changes that individually don't amount to much, but when you pile them on it becomes overwhelming. I will muddle through and be up to speed quickly, no doubt, but feel like I have mush for brains and it's only day #1!

Shoes suck

My physical therapist asked me to bring my left shoe with me for sessions, so that I don't walk on the treadmill in bare feet or in socks. I suppose this IS slightly dangerous so I attempted to comply. First I had to FIND the left shoes, because I haven't actually worn them since October. I have a vast collection of right shoes lined up in my foyer. It's quite humorous.

I tried to squeeze into every left shoe that was remotely fit for walking on a treadmill. This was not only very painful, but really didn't work either. I couldn't find ONE PAIR that fit on the left foot! My ankle doesn't look that swollen anymore, but I guess looks are deceiving. So, I trekked out to the shoe outlet and bought a new pair of New Balance tennis shoes in a 9 Wide. They fit, though uncomfortably...

I went to PT on Wednesday and after the whirlpool warm up I put my foot in the shoe for my exercises and 7 minutes on the treadmill. It felt like I was walking on a lump under the side of my left foot. I actually thought there was something in the shoe until I realized that the lump was my own swollen foot!

After PT I came home and attempted to put the shoe on again. It was as if the shoe shrunk two sizes...there was NO WAY I was getting my foot in the damn thing. I managed to get it back on today, after a whole day of rest yesterday, and now the process has started all over again.

I really hope that my shoe collection isn't banished forever. I had to replace every shoe after Ryan was born when I permanently grew a half size. After 3 years of adding to the collection it would suck to have to get rid of everything or have to buy stuff in larger sizes that will be too big in just a few months once the swelling really goes away.

Grrrr...shoe shopping is my least favorite activity to begin with because I have always had weird feet. They're in between a medium and wide width and nothing ever fits right. Most women would LOVE to have an excuse to shoe shop, but not this girl. Just one more side effect of the surgery I suppose.

Last week of freedom

Officially this is my last week at home, as I return to work on Monday. I'll only be working from 9am-2pm to get started, but once I tack on 2 hours of PT (which starts at 2:45pm) it's basically a very full day. Well, only 3 days a week will be like this. I get a reprieve on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but am supposed to do my exercises at home 2x/day. We'll see how that goes.

This week has been very challenging for me. Since I was cleared on Monday by my doctor I have wanted to conquer the world--or at least the clutter in my house. On Tuesday, I started with Ryan's room and cleared out 3 boxes of stuff to take to Once Upon a Child. Problem is, the boxes are ready to go but I keep forgetting to have Aaron put them in my car because I can't carry them down the stairs and out the door. So, this will get done Saturday. Naturally, Ryan's room now looks like a cyclone went through because a 3 year old can total a room in about 3.5 seconds flat. Grrr...

I spent a couple of hours yesterday mucking out my bedroom since this hasn't been done since I was first put in a cast on October 4th. A lot of clutter builds up in 4 months--I was shocked! I took 4 whole bags of clothes to the Salvation Army and it still doesn't look like I have made much progress. OK, so I probably haven't purged in longer than 4 months--most likely during "spring cleaning" last year. Sheesh.

The good news--I put on and zipped up pants that I could not wear at the end of last summer. I was shocked! I haven't weighed myself yet, because I hate seeing the # and prefer to go on how things fit. But, it appears that I've lost one whole pant size and that's pretty crazy considering how sedentary I have been since October.

The bad news--all of this activity has really made my foot hurt and swell up like mad. I did so much yesterday before PT that it hurt before PT even started. Last night it ached almost as bad as a week or two post-op, so that really clued me into the fact that I have to slow down and take (excuse the pun) baby steps to get things done.

So today I'm resting and taking it easy. I feel guilty, like I should be doing something, but my body says NO! I have a horrible time just sitting around when I could be doing something productive. This surgery didn't fix that problem. I think only psychotherapy will.

Cleared!

Woo hoo! I have officially been cleared to return to work on Monday, Feburary 23rd! I can only go back for 5 hour shifts at first, because I sit all day at my job and this will cause swelling and I still have to go to PT for 1.5 hrs three times per week. My doc doesn't want me to overdo it at first, so he will gradually increase my hours depending on how my body handles this load. As of today I still can't fit my foot in a regular shoe--so I have to get this swelling down because the doctor doesn't want it to get any worse.

More good news--the 2nd read of the MRI didn't show any tears of the tendons! However, there is still a lot of inflammation that could be making visualizing a tear difficult. So, doc is keeping me in the lace up brace and gave me a prescription for topical anti-inflammatory gel to use on both ankles to reduce the swelling. If in 6-8 weeks I still have a lot of pain he may send me for a repeat MRI. We'll see how it goes. Hopefully it's just a ticked off tendon.

Physical therapy today was good too--I managed 5 minutes on the treadmill today and added quite a few more exercises to my repertoire. It's pretty tender today, so I'll be icing and elevating tonight. Where, I'm not sure. We are getting new couches tomorrow and had to take my trusty couch out today to make room. So, basically there is the floor and one recliner available. I have a feeling Aaron and I will be arguing over the chair. Of course we get new comfy couches once my time relegated to the couch is up...figures!

I'm looking forward to getting back to a normal life soon. Might not be so excited to be back at work once I get there, but I miss my friends and miss being challenged everyday. Just knowing that I can go back is a big mood lifter!

I walked!

PT today made me feel like a champion!

First the super relaxing whirlpool--need one of those at home, badly, but think they cost a lot of dough. Will have to resort to heating pad and regular bathtub.

Then, a nice foot and ankle massage to loosen up the ankle. This hurts a lot where the doc removed that piece of bone, but feels great everywhere else. I could get used to this part of PT.

Some stretching...and then...

3 minutes on the treadmill!!!!!

...at 0.5 miles per hour. Yes, you read that right--half a mile per hour! Holy hell was that slow, but still really difficult. Since October I have been walking like a pirate, all peg-legged, and I have to re-train my foot to walk normally and roll. Those muscles are so atrophied that this is going to take a LONG time, but that's just life.

After the treadmill calf raises (ouch) and balancing on the injured foot (double ouch.) Then ice and I was outta there feeling good--like I have finally accomplished something again!

Yea for me!